www.webdeveloper.com
Page 5 of 36 FirstFirst ... 3456715 ... LastLast
Results 61 to 75 of 532

Thread: What's your best joke?

  1. #61
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    The Big M
    Posts
    669
    friggin hilarious. holy ****. woof! i laughed really hard there.
    <? Damn Browser Incompatibilities ?>
    Dell 1505~2.0 Core Duo~1 gig DDR2-533~ Radeon x1400(256mb)~ Hitachi 100gb 7200rpm
    <? Go Blue. ?>

  2. #62
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    California
    Posts
    135
    Heh heh... I don't think I'll be posting this in the Java Forum

    -Saying that Java is nice because it works on all OS's is like saying that anal sex is nice because it works on all genders.

    -Gorky
    Faster than an OC-48 Line! More powerful than an AMD Athlon 64 FX-55 Processor! Able to jump entire forums in a single bound!

    Roses are #FF0000, violets are #0000FF...

    Feeling the angst of a teenage torpor? Visit A to the Power of Two for help/hinderance.

    "...and the Lord said to John, Come forth and ye shall receive eternal life, but instead John came fifth and won a toaster."

    <pihlopase> Jesus Saves
    <jbroome> pases to moses, SCOOOOORE

  3. #63
    Join Date
    Jun 2003
    Location
    here
    Posts
    4,551
    but HTML is nice and that works on all browsers...

    on the other hand some people may consider anal-sex nice(although I personaly wouldn't)
    If you are using PHP please use the [PHP] and [/PHP] forum tags for highlighting...
    The same applies to HTML and the forums [HTML][/HTML] tags.

  4. #64
    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    California
    Posts
    135
    I agree.

    It's nice to think of, um, both... sides of the issue.

    -Gorky
    Faster than an OC-48 Line! More powerful than an AMD Athlon 64 FX-55 Processor! Able to jump entire forums in a single bound!

    Roses are #FF0000, violets are #0000FF...

    Feeling the angst of a teenage torpor? Visit A to the Power of Two for help/hinderance.

    "...and the Lord said to John, Come forth and ye shall receive eternal life, but instead John came fifth and won a toaster."

    <pihlopase> Jesus Saves
    <jbroome> pases to moses, SCOOOOORE

  5. #65
    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Location
    Alabama, United States
    Posts
    833
    Originally posted by smercer
    Meeting Bill Gates
    ... "Uhh, somebody get me a piece of paper... I'm receiving a fax."
    GREAT!! LOL
    I'm STEALING that one!

  6. #66
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    faraway Romania
    Posts
    471
    Nice jokes. I might steal them for my

    http://best-jokes.hotusa.org
    The danger of religion lies in its most attractive feature. It is the arrogance that comes with thinking you possess the ultimate knowledge.

    .: My Web Development Site :: My Personal Site :.
    .: Web Design Quiz :: PHP/MySQL Quiz :: Test the Dvorak keyboard layout :.

  7. #67
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    North Coast, Australia
    Posts
    271
    Error writer


    There was once a young man who, in his youth, professed his desire to become a great writer.

    When asked to define great, he said, "I want to write stuff that the whole world will read, stuff that people will react to on a truly emotional level, stuff that will make them scream, cry, howl in pain and anger!"

    He now works for Microsoft, writing error messages.
    From: http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/relea...040713-12.html
    George W Bush said on 13 July 2004:
    although we have not found stockpiles of weapons of mass destruction, we were right to go into Iraq.
    George Bush is officially a professional liar, and even professional liars make mistakes in telling lies.

  8. #68
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    At the corner of WALK and DONT WALK
    Posts
    1,714
    A couple of bikers were driving down the road, when they saw a nun, whose car had a flat tire. She also had a broken arm.

    The bikers stopped to help, and in no time, they had the flat off, and the spare on, and were ready to head out.

    While they were going to their bikes, one turned around and headed back, and said "Sister, how'd you break your arm? I mean, us bikers, we crash, brawl, and whatever, broken bones is part of the daily routine, but you nuns lead a pretty sheltered life."

    The nun blushed a bit, and said "Well, I slipped and fell in the bathtub."

    The Biker nodded. "Oh, okay," he said, and headed back to his bike.

    His buddy looked at him, and said "Well, what happened to her?"

    "Oh, she slipped and fell in the bathtub."

    The buddy thought for a moment, then asked - "Well, what's a bathtub?"

    "I dunno, I'm not Catholic."

  9. #69
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    North Coast, Australia
    Posts
    271
    Originally posted by Mr Initial Man
    "I dunno, I'm not Catholic."
    I don't get it, how is that funny?
    From: http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/relea...040713-12.html
    George W Bush said on 13 July 2004:
    although we have not found stockpiles of weapons of mass destruction, we were right to go into Iraq.
    George Bush is officially a professional liar, and even professional liars make mistakes in telling lies.

  10. #70
    Join Date
    Oct 2004
    Location
    faraway Romania
    Posts
    471
    coz the bikers don't wash!
    The danger of religion lies in its most attractive feature. It is the arrogance that comes with thinking you possess the ultimate knowledge.

    .: My Web Development Site :: My Personal Site :.
    .: Web Design Quiz :: PHP/MySQL Quiz :: Test the Dvorak keyboard layout :.

  11. #71
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    North Coast, Australia
    Posts
    271
    Originally posted by amazing_andr3
    coz the bikers don't wash!
    I still do not find it very funny

    heres another joke:
    Top 15 Things People Think the '95' in 'Windows 95' Really Stands For

    15. The 95 stands for average CPH : Crash Per Hour.
    14. Bill Gates' age when it ships.
    13. The number of days until Gates tries to sell you a newer OS.
    12. The required number of megabytes of RAM to run at useable speed.
    11. The percentage that will be complete on the shipping date.
    10. The number of floppies it will ship in.
    9. The percentage of people who will have to upgrade their hardware.
    8. The number of megabytes of hard disk space required.
    7. The number of pages in the EASY-INSTALL version of the manual.
    6. The percentage of existing windoze programs that won't run in the new OS.
    5. The number of minutes to install.
    4. The number of calls to tech support before you can get it to run.
    3. The number of people who will actually PAY for the upgrade.
    2. The number of MHz required for the OS to run.
    1. The year it was due to ship.
    From: http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/relea...040713-12.html
    George W Bush said on 13 July 2004:
    although we have not found stockpiles of weapons of mass destruction, we were right to go into Iraq.
    George Bush is officially a professional liar, and even professional liars make mistakes in telling lies.

  12. #72
    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    At the corner of WALK and DONT WALK
    Posts
    1,714
    Originally posted by smercer
    I still do not find it very funny
    Guess it's just a joke only Bikers would get...


    Okay, here's another one.

    A con man drove into a small town, and stopped at the local gas station. He saw a young girl at the till, and so he chatted her up a bit, then said "By the way, I need change for this $12 bill." The cashier looked at it, smiled sweetly, and said "Certainly. Would you like threes, fours, or sixes?"

  13. #73
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    North Coast, Australia
    Posts
    271
    What you don't want at work (see attachment)
    Attached Images Attached Images
    From: http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/relea...040713-12.html
    George W Bush said on 13 July 2004:
    although we have not found stockpiles of weapons of mass destruction, we were right to go into Iraq.
    George Bush is officially a professional liar, and even professional liars make mistakes in telling lies.

  14. #74
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    North Coast, Australia
    Posts
    271
    Shh...don't tell the women about this one!! ha ha
    Attached Images Attached Images
    From: http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/relea...040713-12.html
    George W Bush said on 13 July 2004:
    although we have not found stockpiles of weapons of mass destruction, we were right to go into Iraq.
    George Bush is officially a professional liar, and even professional liars make mistakes in telling lies.

  15. #75
    Join Date
    May 2004
    Location
    North Coast, Australia
    Posts
    271
    Just be glad it's only a picture!! (see attachment)
    Attached Images Attached Images
    From: http://www.whitehouse.gov/news/relea...040713-12.html
    George W Bush said on 13 July 2004:
    although we have not found stockpiles of weapons of mass destruction, we were right to go into Iraq.
    George Bush is officially a professional liar, and even professional liars make mistakes in telling lies.

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
HTML5 Development Center



Recent Articles