That sounds pretty confusing. Who did you place the back order through?
Just because somebody else grabbed your domain with 'the' in front of it doens't mean that your back order should have been scrapped.
Failing that,if you need to find a new domain, check out www.mydomainfriend.com - it's a great tool for combining keywords and searching domains(best of all it's free)
might help you find a domain just as good as the original.